Loving Savagely

I would say I wish it were possible to make Dan Savage fall madly in love with me and marry me, but I know deep down that this would only make him miserable as he is gay and already married.

Also, I love S. and already intend to be married to him, eventually, when I get the rest of my life sorted out and something like marriage can actually become a priority instead of existing only as my mother's fantasy for me.

However, this doesn't stop me from practically worshipping Dan Savage. S. listens to his podcast, and I live for every Thursday when I can pick up my free copy of Now magazine at work, and read Savage Love during my break.

I love how he doesn't take shit from people, and how he can be alternately sympathetic or condemning. I enjoy it in particular when he shoots down someone who tries to rationalize their bad behaviour by blaming it on childhood baggage or a unpleasant relationship experience. I can always count on him to give a big 'fuck you' to social conservatives and hypocritical Christians.
(see: http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=5135029)

I think part of the reason I derive so much pleasure from his harsh views towards religious beliefs criticizing extra-marital or even polyamorous sex and gay marriage (in particular gay marriage) is because even as a recovering Catholic I can't understand how some Christians can be so goddamned uptight.

I was raised in a Catholic household, attended a Catholic elementary school, and eventually went to a public high school where religion was not part of the curriculum, but where there was a Christian fellowship that I joined for the five years of my secondary school career. I had all the beginnings of a bigot.

Maybe the difference in my upbringing was that my mother (the only practising Catholic adult in our home; my dad is the son of a former, and now dead, United Church minister, and my dad is a strict believer in evolution and believes that the existence of any god is highly unlikely) has always been a very accepting person, as Christ always taught people to be. Case in point: she watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show with me when I was nine. She was a big fan of the movie when it came out in the seventies, and when it played on Much Music the year I was in grade four, I watched it with her.

Obviously I had some questions about the film, mainly, "Why is that man wearing ladies clothes?" It was a peculiarity I had not yet encountered in my young life, aside from attempting to dress my brother in one of my dresses and pretending he was my sister. She said, "Because he likes to." No further explanation, no statement about how it was something that not everyone likes to do, or that Tim Curry was somehow "different".

I took the whole thing very much in stride. And why not? Children gauge the reaction of the adults in their lives in order to come up with their own reaction. Had my mother not been a fan of Rocky Horror and lambasted Tim Curry, and the film, for being crazy gay, I likely would have felt the same way.

Likewise, I used to freak out if I heard the smoke detector go off in our house, but calmed down immediately upon discovering that my mom was completely unconcerned, only newly burnt pot of carrots sitting on the stove-top.

Having been raised Catholic, and having no issues with gays, anal sex, deviant sexual behaviour (very much enjoying my own frequent experiences with bisexual adventures), and thoroughly enjoying the movie Shortbus, I have very little patience for anyone who presents intolerance and a sense of religion-induced self-righteousness.

And reading Dan Savage's vicious attacks against anyone like that just makes my cynical little heart burst with glee and, I won't lie, a bit of girl cream.